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Post by 1:( on Jan 14, 2005 12:10:44 GMT -5
Was that on Lots of Noise?
The only forum I even check on that board is Upcoming Shows(and sometimes Talk about records). There was an incident a little while back that kind of scared me out of posting there.
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Post by sc00ts on Jan 14, 2005 12:13:54 GMT -5
different board
her weird syntax/word choice often makes for a funny quote
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Post by Shevy on Jan 14, 2005 12:50:44 GMT -5
Anna: Yes. I did base my entire argument on talent and theory. WHAT THE FUCK ELES MAKES GOOD MUSIC, DUMBASS?...And I was wrong, people like you shouldn't smoke pot, you're not smart enough to handle an open mind. Normally something like this might make me angry, but in this case I just feel bad for her. Life sucks when you're dumb as shit. |
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Post by Shevy on Jan 14, 2005 12:53:12 GMT -5
"I'm vegetarian, but I would certainly drink human blood and eat human flesh, no doubt about this. " Sounds like yet another person mad at humanity for being picked on too much as a kid. "Duuuhhh...animals are cool because they don't call me a faggot and knock my schoolbooks out of my hand..." |
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Post by unclemeat on Jan 14, 2005 16:51:40 GMT -5
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Post by Shevy on Jan 14, 2005 17:05:47 GMT -5
Holy shit. I never thought I would see the day when the MMBB returned.
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Post by 1:( on Jan 14, 2005 22:25:04 GMT -5
A guy I work with today said something authentically funny.
"There should be a Jewish death metal band called Auschwitz."
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Post by Shevy on Jan 21, 2005 14:28:34 GMT -5
Today, yet another person asked me, "Hey, do you remember that Cheech & Chong movie where blah blah blah...?"
Maybe it's just me, but that's just a dumb fucking question.
"Yes, I laughed through the whole thing. No, I wasn't in any state of mind to remember most of it. What else would you like me to remember? A previous life, perhaps?"
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Post by 1:( on Jan 28, 2005 16:41:06 GMT -5
Have you seen this listing on Return to the Pit? It's obviously fake, but it's hilarious.
"-=]AWESOME FEST[=- Cautious Panties, Forest of Rainbows, Blood Bomb, Carribian Cruisers, Polly Peptide and the Handjob Masquade, Negrodamus, 3 word Name, Kids Punching Cops, Serpents of Candlabra, The Vagtables, Henry's tampon Collection, Juicy Fruit, Haunted Bong, Gunt, Cocaine Oberservatory, The Fratellis, X on Hand Hand on Cock, Blood Bubble, Pubic Zirconia, Neon Nazis, Cops Fear Retard Gang, These Pants Fallen, Eyes will Blink, Abercrombie Mosh Pit, and special guest Rado!!! 18 Dollars/15 with a pair of soiled linens or hamper fixins. Doors open at noon, bring a picnic, Your castro hat or your elitist east coast hahhdcore attitude."
It's apparently in New Hampshire too...haha.
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Post by Shevy on Jan 28, 2005 17:24:19 GMT -5
Ha! Awesome.
I was using the mechanic's bathroom at work the other day, and one of the mechanics was in there taking a nasty shit. I was washing my hands right when he was finishing up, and one of the guys from the body shop walks through the door. He yells out, "Jesus Christ! What the hell happened in here?"
So the mechanic replies, "Well, that's why they call it 'shit'! They don't call it 'ice cream'..."
Then they started arguing about how bad it smelled in there as I walked out laughing. If it didn't actually smell like somebody set a wet dog on fire in there I would have stuck around to see how it turned out.
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Post by 1:( on Jan 30, 2005 22:21:55 GMT -5
A while ago at the Futurama board I post at, some girl posted a picture of Zoidberg all metaled out and I thought "Wow cool", so I said something about how I liked metal when it was authentic and I got this: "I totally agree with you! I don't like these popular "metal" bands everyone loves, and these bands only seem to do it because of money, fame etc. I feel Evanescence is one of them, but I can listen to their music, though... I wish there were more bands like Metallica, Manowar and System Of A Down...  " I felt like I got bitchslapped by myself. |
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Post by WarriorPope on Feb 18, 2005 13:02:22 GMT -5
"I have a hard enough time keeping up with only two boards (and for the record, one of them is lucky it gets 5 posts a day). How the fuck do you people do it?
- Warrior Pope, 18 Feb 05[/i]
How bout that loser
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Post by unclemeat on Feb 18, 2005 14:31:39 GMT -5
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Post by Shevy on Feb 18, 2005 16:01:47 GMT -5
That's one shitty website, dude.
I was talking with one of the salesmen at the Chrysler store today, and he was explaining how last night he picked up some girl at a club that had some disease which required her to carry an oxygen tank with her. He said as he was ramming her while she was trying to inhale from her mask in stuff. So he says, "Whatever, I was drunk. I've nicknamed her 'Ho2' ".
Classy.
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Post by 1:( on Feb 27, 2005 22:12:48 GMT -5
Picture this one in some angsty 16-year old kid voice. It's priceless.
From an XfilesX demo:
"What could you possibly have against straight edge? Other than the fact that your average straight edge is a white suburban rich kid with a superiority complex and a jockish need to act out violently, nothing."
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Post by 1:( on Mar 3, 2005 18:55:04 GMT -5
"I don't believe my eyes... LAGWAGON shitty alternative with a punk beat?? Dude what song/album have you heard of them? They're the gods of punk rock"
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Post by 1:( on Apr 7, 2005 11:04:35 GMT -5
This one's from a few days ago and needs a little bit of backstory.
About 2-3 weeks ago I was in my friend's car and we get rear ended. We were pulling out of the junior parking lot(so much for senior priviledges) and the girl behind us wasn't paying attention. So we all pulled over and she was apologizing, blah blah, police reports. Anyway, my friend hadn't contacted this girl yet over the prices or anything(his bumper is kind of falling off) but word has it she said something along the lines of "It's too bad...he was pretty cute." So I'm with this kid and a couple other people a few days ago, all of us playing Super Smash Bros.(business as usual) talking about how this girl who rear ended this girl said he was cute. So he says something jokingly that for some reason, all of us thought was hilarious.
"I'll tell her that when she crashed into my car, she crashed into my heart."
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Post by sc00ts on Apr 7, 2005 11:09:25 GMT -5
i rearended a dude on my way to work in december and i had my rob halford leather on at the time. the state trooper who wrote up the report walked up to me and said "that's a fancy jacket" in a total deadpan.
my boss noticed that i never wear my jacket into the bldg and asked why. i told him i'd never hear the end of it if the people working there saw it. "oh, it's that nice?" he asked totally serious.
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Post by Shevy on Apr 7, 2005 11:24:54 GMT -5
Lamp: The quote freakin' rocks.
Scoots: Totally understandable why you wouldn't want to bring that jacket inside the building. It probably cost a lot of money, and it would be a shame if it started smelling like McDonalds burgers and fries from being hung-up in the staff lunchroom all day.
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Post by sc00ts on Apr 7, 2005 11:34:52 GMT -5
shev if you wore like a green shirt here people would be like "whoa whoa WHOA, whattayou some kinda johnny hollywood rockstar? haw haw haw. are you in ledded zeppelin now? haw haw haw. watch out when you walk done the street, some guy may try to come home with you. haw haw haw."
obviously i work in like the greatest place possible.
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"